KNOW THAT THE SYSTEM IS NOT GOING TO DIFFERENTIATE BETWEEN THE REGULAR DOMESTIC SPATS AND THE WOMAN WHO LEAVES AND IS CONSTANTLY FOLLOWED, HARRASSED, VIOLATED AND THE SITUATION IS GOING TO ESCALATE. THE ODDS THAT A WOMAN IS MORE LIKELY TO BE KILLED IF SHE LEAVES ARE GREAT.THE ONLY WAY THIS MIGHT BE AVERTED IS IF THERE IS AN IMMEDIATE AND DEFINITIVE PROGRAM FOR THE ABUSER AND VICTIM FROM THE FIRST INCIDENT. THESE ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN. THE LEGAL SYSTEM DOES NOT HAVE MUCH IN THE WAY OF "YOU CAN'T DO THAT ANYMORE".
AN EVEN BETTER THOUGHT IS PREVENTION. THE SELF-IMPOSED IDENTITY OF A WOMAN WHO "CAN'T MAKE IT ON HER OWN" IS ONE THAT WILL ENCOURAGE A WOMAN TO PICK ANY MAN, EVEN IF HE IS THE WRONG ONE. THE BOTTOM FEEDERS ARE EASY TO FIND. BECOME ALL THAT YOU CAN BE AND LIKE YOURSELF ON YOUR OWN. VALUE YOURSELF! IF YOU DON'T KNOW, A RELATIONSHIP SHOULD BE A SAFE HAVEN. IF YOU ARE A PERSON WHO IS SYMPATHETIC AND THINKS THAT MAN'S PAST IS THE PAST, THINK THAT THOSE NEGATIVE THINGS ARE LIES OR THAT YOU CAN REFORM HIM, DO NOT FOOL YOURSELF INTO THINKING THAT YOU CAN CHANGE HIM! YOUR GOOD QUALITIES WILL BE USED AGAINST YOU. DON'T JUST LOOK FOR GOOD QUALITIES. PROCEED WITH CAUTION. CHECK HIM OUT! WHAT'S THE HURRY? IF YOU ARE DELIBERATELY HARMED PHYSICALL OR MENTALLY, RUN WHILE YOU CAN.REMEMBER, LISA'S MURDERER SAID THAT HE ONLY SLAPPED HER ONCE. THERE'S SOMEONE BETTER FOR YOU. TAKE GOOD CARE OF NUMBER ONE AND THAT'S YOU. TAKING LISA'S MESSAGES TO YOU. MILLIE HELLO, iVE BEEN "AWAY" FOR A WHILE. i'VE BEEN COMFORTING MY "BEST BUD" OF 20 YEARS WHILE HE LEFT ME FOR ANOTHER PLACE. HE DIED IN MY ARMS ON APRIL 9 .THIS LEADS ME TO TELL YOU MY EXPERIENCE WITH JOE.
WE HAD TALKED ON THE PHONE FOR SEVERAL WEEKS BEFORE WE DECIDED TO MEET HALFWAY BETWEEN OUR RESPECTIVE CITIES. HE CHOSE A FAMILY TYPE RESTAURANT FOR LUNCH. I THOUGHT," I GUESS ALCOHOL IS NOT A NECESSITY." I WAS USED TO GUYS PULLING UP TO MY CONDO IN A SPORTY OR LXURIOUS CAR WITH FLOWERS AND FOLLOWED BY AN EVENING OF DINNER AND DANCING. WHEN I SAW HIM PULL UP INTO THE PARKING LOT IN HIS LITTLE RED CAR,, I LOOKED OVER AND SAIDTO MYSELF, "OH, NO, TOO OLD, TOO SHOR,T NOT ENOUGH HAIR. THIS WILL BE THE ONE AND ONLY MEETING." AFTER LUNCH, WE WALKED TO HIS CAR WHERE HE SHOWED ME PICTURES OF HIS FAMILY AND THEN WENT TO A PARK ACROSS THE STREET WHERE WE SAT AT A PICNIC TABLE AND HE SHOWED ME PICTURES OF HIS FAMILY FROM AN ALBUM. WE FINALIZED OUR DATE WITH A TRIP TO THE LOCAL DAIRY QUEEN. I THOUGHT" "HOW BIZARRE, AND HOW ABSOLUTELY REFRESHING"! " THERE IS SCIENTIFIC EVIDENCE THAT WE ARE NATURE CUED TO PICK THE MOST TALL, MOST HANDSOME, MOST STRONG, MOST VIRILE LOOKING MEN IN ORDER TO CHOOSE THE BEST MATE TO PROTECT US AND SIRE THE BEST CHILDREN. THIS APPLIES TO MEN AS WELL, WHO LOOK FOR THE YOUNGEST, MOST FERTILE AND ATTRACTIVE WOMEN. WELL, GUESS WHAT? TtHESE ARE THE WRONG CUES FOR A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP. WE DON'T NEED PROTECTION AND WE DON'T NEED A VOLATILE, DOMINANT MALE. iF YOU'RE LUCKY ENOUGH TO MEET A MAN WHO IS SHORT, BALD, DOESN'T HAVE MUCH MONEY IS KIND AND GENTLE, WITH WHOM YOU SHARE VALUES AND LAUGHTER AND FUN, GRAB HIM BEFORE SOMEBODY ELSE DOES. IF ONE OF HIS GREATEST PLEASURES IN LIFE IS BEING LOYAL TO YOU AND RUBBING YOUR FEET, YOU'RE WAY AHEAD OF THE GAME. MILLIE THE OLD BOY'S CLUB WAS ALREADY AT WORK AT THE TIME OF LEE'S AND THE GIRLS PENDING PURCHASE OF THEIR HOME. THERE WAS A MEETING WITH ALL THE ATTORNEYS FOR THE TRUST AND THE BANK. SHE ARRIVED EARLY. ONLY ONE OF THE ATTORNEYS WAS THERE AND HIS FIRST REMARK TO LEE WAS, "YOU KNOW, VINCENTE SAID THAT YOU WERE MOVING IN WITH A MAN, AND WE CAN'T HAVE THAT."
LEE'S MOUTH DROPPED OPEN. sHE COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT THEY WOULD AUTOMATICALLY BELIEVE ANYTHING VINCENTE TOLD THEM. THE FACT THAT IT WAS NOT TRUE DID NOT ANGER HER SO MUCH AS THEIR INEVITABLE ACCEPTANCE OF ANYTHING HE SAID TO DEFAME HER. SHE HAD WITNESSED, FIRSTHAND, HOW ATTORNEYS FAWNED OVER HER EX-HUSBAND. THIS IN SPITE OF THE FACT THAT SHE SOLELY WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR OBTAINING THE TRUST AND ALL THE RESPONSIBILITY OF THE GIRLS AND THE TRUST, AND UNLIKE HER, HAD NO PERSONAL FINANCIAL INVESTMENT.. THIS WOULD CONTINUE OVER THE YEARS TO THE EXTENT OF DRIVING HER ALMOST OVER THE EDGE. THEY'RE OUT THERE. KNOW IT AND WATCH FOR IT. MILLIE Who can tell me why? Human rights are a societal issue. Where is the Civil Liberties Union when a man beats his wife or girlfriend and it's ruled a misdemeanor, but it's called a felony when he hits another man. We need people in the legal system with "the right stuff". People who are justice driven and not money or criminal driven. There could be no more important career choice for a woman or man that to enter the system, stand up and expect accountability from those we are supposed to be able to trust.
Tough, yes. Right, yes. Millie | AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesJuly 2012 CategoriesAll |
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